wat bout pragnant strippers??
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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