i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
