He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
