Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
