Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
