my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
how do flat chested girls get laid?
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
