Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Randomize