Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
nutella sex= disaster
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
