Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
