I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
