guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
