sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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