Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
