what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
