I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
the day after is always just damage control
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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