how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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