Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
