Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
