I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize
