at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Randomize