dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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