To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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