somebody snuck up and got me drunk
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
you had me at cake vodka
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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