I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
they're like a gay fantastic four
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Randomize
