And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
3 2 1 whiskey
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
