Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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