I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
My life is pants optional.
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