morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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