Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Randomize