Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
