@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
