I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
