i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize