The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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