If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
