These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
