thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
