No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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