girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
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