if i can run in heels then i can drive
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
