quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
