i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
