It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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