ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I'm just crazy horny about you
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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