So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I texted him: “Come over for the Super Bowl. I promise lots of scoring.”
My divorce is turning into a porn script
Randomize
