dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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