So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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