So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
