White coat. Heels.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
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