Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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