i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize